No Dutchmen Need Apply

Mildred and Milton are upset. They lived and worked their entire lives in Allentown. They both started working in sewing factories after high school and spend their working lives there. During the late 60's they owned their only car, and always lived in apartments. They never sought any help from the government, their culture taught them to make it do, use it up, wear it out and do without. When they heard about these new public housing apartments overlooking the Lehigh, they thought that would be a nice reward for a life of hard work. They were told it would take years,years they don't have, to get on the list. It's hard for them to understand how brand newcomers to the area go to the head of the line. They don't know about the poverty pimps, the social organizations, funded by grants; The professional advocates who know what buttons to push, who make a career out of political correctness. Maybe we need a Pennsylvania Dutch American Organization.

reprinted from 2007 and 2010 

ADDENDUM: Needless to say ,the previous times I published this piece some readers were offended by its bluntness. Here we are in 2017, and Mayor Pawlowski isn't even seeking Mildred and Milton's vote.

UPDATE NOVEMBER 2021: Fourteen years later, and my 2007 post is more politically incorrect than ever. Mildred and Milton were real people, who never got into Overlook Park. Things come and go...The strawberry pie at Hess's, Roadside America and the Mildreds' and Miltons' of Allentown.

Allentown Before Crime Became Everyday

Shown above is a citizen certificate from Allentown's better days, before crime and violence were everyday occurrences.  Some civic cheerleaders, mostly newcomers,  think that the best days are now,  and that those of us who think otherwise must dwell in a house of negativity. 

The local culture has changed so much that rather than citizens reporting suspicious activity,  they won't even cooperate with police against actual crime, even if they're a victim. We have city council members supporting efforts to defund the police. 

In some communities on the west coast, where defund efforts are more prominent,  young shooters are being paid a monthly stipend of up to a $1000 a month not to shoot anybody. However,  to quality for the allowance, you must have already shot someone. Allentown has already committed a $million dollars of our federal grant money to privately run violence reduction programs, and $250,000 to study inequity in the city. Other local activists have started their own organizations and are queuing up for their grants. This nonsense is given legitimacy by the Morning Call, which repeatedly refers to these opportunists as activists. Their newly graduated cub reporters have no knowledge of Allentown last year, much less any institutional knowledge of the city.

Hope I don't come to look back on our present as the good old days, but that may well be in the cards.

certificate shown courtesy of Daniel Ruth, circa 1980

The Morning Call Marches Toward Garbage Can

When the woman from India called last month to offer me the Sunday paper for free, I told her not only didn't I want it, but that I would cancel my digital subscription if they ever put it on my driveway. Not only could she read the English script, but she understood my reply. 

Although i'm aging and it becomes more difficult to pick things up, I'm still a very early riser.  I have no need for a heavy newspaper out near the street, hours after I already read the digital version. On the contrary, disposing of it is a nuisance.  The woman from India who called yesterday could barely read the script, and didn't understand my English replies at all. After I told her I didn't want the free paper and delivery, she keep reading the script anyway, like a robot with poor English.

In today's paper, reconstituted Bill White is rehashing his hatred of long gone Emma Tropiano. While the newspaper still hasn't reported who finally won the third county judgeship (Ritter prevailed by 74 votes) it spends its limited resources and space with White's nonsense. 

As a local blogger, I maintain digital subscriptions to various sources. With the Morning Call, the annoyances are starting to outweigh their news.

Changing Justice In Allentown

My recent post, Losses For Allentown, mentioned incumbent District Justice Patti Engler losing her bench. The district magistrate system is our first line of defense against Allentown's growing criminality. It is before these district judges that defendants are brought to arraignment by the police department. 

In Allentown's past, district judges were often former policemen. I believe that it would be fair to label Engler's replacement, Linda Vega Sirop, as a social activist. During the campaign she promoted that she would be both the first Latina and first gay if elected.

Philadelphia is no longer the City Of Brotherly Love, unless you're Cain and Abel. The crime and murder rate is horrendous. Social progressives there in both the police and DA's office last year suspended arresting people for shoplifting, until the merchants were almost cleaned out. Philly's latest obsurdity is not enforcing minor traffic violators, because they target people of color too much. Let us hope that down Allentown's road our new district judges won't subvert the efforts of our police department.

ADDENDUM: Although my original premise for this post was that Vega Sirop might be too progressive for Allentown's good, in fairness, that may not be the case.  She's a strong woman, who was laser focused on obtaining this position. I suspect that she will take the judgeship as a sacred mission.

The Devil Of Ocean Paradise

The resort town's boardwalk is partially open during the cold winter months for the hardy of spirit.  The stores that remain open were purchased mostly by middle eastern immigrants, who overpaid for their piece of the American dream in the dying resort.  Their mortgage demands every nickel they can muster,  and their large families are eager to practice their broken English on the few customers willing to brave the boardwalk's cold winter wind.

All their stores sell the same things...  brightly colored candy, souvenirs and small toys designed to make children nag and beg.  Along with the stores there is a strip of game stands, where during the warm summer breezes,  fathers and boyfriends hope to win a stuffed animal.  During the winter, the steel garage doors are closed on all these stands, except for one.  The immigrants with their broken English cannot lure in players, but the Devil can.

Oversized brightly colored stuffed animals adorn the stand. Music from the 70's pulses from one loud speaker,  while the Devil commands the occasional passing man to "show her that you care by winning a bear."  Please don't misunderstand me, he is not Satan himself, but a minor devil.  He can give you a cold, or ruin a first date,  but he has no power over life and death.  Even those he afflicts can purchase redemption.... Inside the stores there are chocolate wafers for sale,  covered with white candy sprinkles.  For a mere $26 a pound, the bad omen can be eaten away.

This minor devil came from Coney Island a decade ago.  Brooklyn's Brighton Beach area started gentrifying in the late 90's, and the dress up spread to adjoining Coney.  Doc, the minor devil, thrived on hearty spirits, but not heady minds.  His move to Ocean Paradise was a win-win.  While the owning immigrant gets to keep almost all the money the stand takes in,  Doc gets to dispense a headache or two each weekend.  He has a room at a nearby old motel owned by the same family, and enjoys the middle eastern food that he has eaten since time immemorial.

If you walk on the boardwalk during the winter, you better dress warm, and not be tempted to show her that you care.

reprinted from November of 2018

Losses For Allentown

Years ago there was always a group of regulars who would attend city council meetings.  Many of them were advocates for their section of Allentown.  Among them was Bob Smith Jr.,  concerned with the East Side, and Patti Engler, watching out for center city. Years later, when they ran respectively for school board and district justice, they already possessed a wealth of civic knowledge. 

Both these incredibly qualified people lost in last week's election.  Local voters are preoccupied with diversity and electing candidates who look like themselves.  Although those motivations are understandable, in doing so they sacrificed the service of two great public servants.

Both Smith and Engler will still be visible in their neighborhoods, improving the quality of life for their neighbors...That's the type of people they are.